Yet Another One Down.

So it's the new year and I haven't posted in ages. I'm slightly mashed from neckies and listening to Tegan and Sara/songs I grew up to in the 90's. Life is pretty mad at the moment. I'm back in Goulburn, chillin with the G-Burn Dawgs and lookin at gettin a job at a fruit store. Birfday is soon, will be keen to do another deals at King O'Malleys this year.

New Deals

Still kinda drunk, watching Supernatural with about 3 GB of porn at my fingertips. All is looking up in the world.

Eli

Where the fuck are you when I need to talk to you?

Down The Drain

So July seems to be a plumbing themed month, and all I ever seem to write about these days is crap.
Today is no exception.
"It feels that I'm slowly growing further and further away from the outside world." Probably the most accurate summary of things right now.
I went to the doctor a few weeks ago to get a cough looked at and ended up getting referred to a psychologist. It's getting worse for all of us at the moment it seems, which does not help at all. It's hard to feel at home or at ease when the place you live in is cut off most of the time from everyone but your landlord, and even when you're with your friends you feel alone.Then compound onto that the bullshit things that have been happening lately and the general feeling of 'fuck it all' coming from a few of us.
I remember the first session I had, the lady told me that it was all just hormones and that if I did breathing exercises and went to bed earlier it would help a lot. I wish fixing ourselves was as easy as breathing. But at the moment it's a bit of an all the kings horses and all the kings men situation.
Everything is slipping away like sand through open hands. My jobs, my family, my friends, my heart and now finally my sanity.

Life

This fucking sucks. I know i brought it on myself, and if I could go back and change it, I would. I'd do anything to fix what's happening. I feel like a divorced husband who's given everything to his ex-wife. At the worst possible time, I have nobody around. Everyone is busy or all having fun with Ivan. I can't see my own friends because I lack the capacity to keep my fucking mouth shut. I can't even remember the last time I felt so alone. It's only been about a week or two since i last saw everyone, but even that is far too long to be away from people like them. I just don't want to be in this city anymore. I need to get away from everything, go somewhere where nobody knows me. Make friends with mediocre people who i won't miss when they're away, who won't care if I'm not around. Just live a life where i don't have to deal with this shit. Fuck it all.

Saikano

Such an intense series.

Satisfied Mind

How many times have you heard someone say,
If I had money I would do things my way.
But little they know that it's so hard to find.
One rich man in ten with a satisfied mind.

Money can't buy her back, or your youth when you're old,
A friend when you're lonely, or a piece to your soul,
The wealthiest person is a pauper at times,
Compared to the man with a satisfied mind.

When my life is over and my time has run out,
My friends and my lovers, I will leave, there's no doubt.
But one thing's for certain when it comes my time,
I'll leave this old world with a satisfied mind.